loving you, loving myself

when I care for me, I care for you,

caring for you is caring for me,

caring for me is caring for you,

even when the correlation is not always clear.

I admit that I sometimes get nervous,

and when I do,

I get worried that I will be forgotten, that I will be destroyed.

And then, I know I am meant to be here and experience it all.
I am not afraid of being myself,

even when I have to remind myself,

there is enough to go around.

Love love love.

¿Why should I be afraid of overflowing with devotion?

I know the parts of me that want to destroy things,

it is only an emotion that does not know where to go.

I think of when I was a child and I learned speaking was dangerous.

Sharing became scary.

Occupying spaces could mean punishment.

Punishment,

such a basic word,

and it somehow keeps a part of me tied to its damaging philosophy.

To face consequences, to suffer, to endure,

because it mistakes are costly.

I am not in relationship to play a game of authority,

to win a contest of defiance,

my little ego and her control.

failure is data about alignment.
My hear is not a prison cell.

Panoptic thinking keeps me caged,

that is not what hope give me.

Love is freeing me, from my own conditioning.

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